Monthly Archives: July 2008

Viewer Mail #27: Boink!

By Conlan | Published: July 17, 2008
“Boink” is an onomatopoeia. Some pervert writes: “Boink”? Yeah, it’s onomatopoeia for sexual activity! Dear Pervert: WRONG. Sexual activity does not sound like that… I mean, it does if you do it right, but few are that skilled. Boink is the sound of getting hit on the head with an animated object of some kind (which, incidentally, [...]
Posted in Ask Conlan | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

A letter, goodbye

By Conlan | Published: July 12, 2008
Dear San Francisco, Yesterday I had one of those epiphanic moments, like in movies, when the protagonist’s life floats past his eyes and he realizes he’s been in love with his best friend all along. Everything he’s ever wanted has been right in front of him the whole time. You know, Hollywood bullshit like that. I love [...]
Posted in Life | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Viewer Mail #25: Rumors

By Conlan | Published: July 9, 2008
A reader: Dear Conlan, Are the rumors true? Hee haw, Sam Wainwright Almost always. Especially if they’re about someone being a slut. Thanks for writing, Sam.
Posted in Ask Conlan | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

  • Hello there.

    This is Conlan. I'm a freelance writer and blogger. I live in Fresno, CA. I write this blog, and other things sometimes. I encourage you to pay me to write things. Please see the "Freelance" page for more information on that. (Seriously.) If you'd just want to know who I am and what I'm all about (including mostly lies), check the "About" page.

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