Sometimes I tell jokes on Twitter and then I freak out and wonder if anybody understood the joke I was trying to make because, OMG, what if I’m not as clever as I think I am!? So then I post them again here and explain them. Sometimes that makes the misunderstandings worse, but This is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest.
Adam Carolla’s “women aren’t funny” comment illustrates the fallacy of confirmation bias and also proves that everyone named Adam is a dick.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 20, 2012
This refers to a stupid comment that has rightfully faded into obscurity, but I wanted to revisit it here because I made a mistake. Confirmation bias isn’t a logical fallacy; it’s a human tendency that leads to fallacious logic. The actual fallacy at play here is a hasty generalization (based on faulty data due to confirmation bias).
Sometimes we all just need a good cry. For me, it’s usually about halfway through my order at the Taco Bell drive-thru.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 19, 2012
I’ve never cried in a Taco Bell drive-thru, but this image was funny to me.
If something sounds too good to be true, try jumping off a tall building to see if you’re dreaming.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 19, 2012
This is kind of a mashup. It starts out as a play on the “If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is” axiom, but what I really like is the idea of taking the “I must be dreaming” trope literally, and then behaving as if you’re in a lucid dream.
Saw my first fireworks stand of the season. It’s so ridiculous how businesses put up these Christmas decorations earlier every year.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 18, 2012
This was really funny back in June.
If it’s someone’s birthday, they should be required to begin every social interaction with that info so I don’t feel like an asshole later.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 24, 2012
This is true.
My main fear about letting people know that I’m crazy, rather than an asshole, is that they’ll just end up thinking I’m a crazy asshole.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 24, 2012
This is true.
Jerry Sandusky’s maximum possible sentence is over 400 years, but—honestly—I’d be satisfied with just 340-350.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 23, 2012
This is a joke about the weird, impractical math the justice system uses to punish crimes. This is also true.
New Zealand is definitely on my list of places to die before I visit.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 22, 2012
I couldn’t really figure out what this joke was. I just knew I liked the “list of places to die before” part, but it doesn’t really make sense. Not even in an absurd way. “Places to die before I see” would’ve been better, maybe, but still not ideal.
I don’t believe in “jinxing myself”, but I do believe in “looking like an idiot”.— Conlan Spangler (@thisisconlan) June 22, 2012
Have you noticed how some people seem to always be talking about the awesome things they’re going to do soon, and how those people seem to never actually do any of those awesome things? Some of them may be pathological liars, but I think a lot of them are just foolishly optimistic.
The idea that talking about possible good things can somehow “jinx” it and cause them not to happen is dumb, but I feel like if I talk about something good that might happen and then it doesn’t happen, I’ll seem like one of those possibly lying and/or foolishly optimistic people. In other words, “like an idiot”.
That concludes this episode of This is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest.
- I prefer Arby’s. [↩]