Let’s just say, it’s been a “long week”. Last night, my best friend and I shared a pint of Ben and Jerry’s[1] and a good cry. I came to some important realizations. I have had it with bad relationships. I’m done being treated like dirt! And I’m done staying when, in my heart, I know [...]
I asked my nine-year-old cousin Nick for advice on women. He offered his simple, effective four-step plan: Kiss her. She will cry. She will kiss you. You will have a girlfriend. Ingenius, no? Update: He has no similar advice for women courting men.
“Are you gay?” “Am I gay?” I want to be sure I understand the question. “Yeah.” The girl is drunk. She wandered into the bar and sat near me. She came in with friends but they’re in the corner talking. “No,” I say. “Do I seem gay?” “Well, you see,” she says, clutching her Bud [...]
She’s got tattoos on her arms; one on her leg. RC has been into tattoos lately, because he likes girls who are brave enough to do things he’s not. She’s pretty cute, I guess. She’s a waitress. No, she’s a busboy. A busgirl… A… busser? You know, an empty-glass-picker-upper. She has great posture. She’s short, [...]